018 - What are You Carrying?

I’m getting really tired of starting every story off with mention of this unprecedented year.

Anyone else? And yet, I can’t avoid the fact that this year has been hard. Though some have been affected by the pandemic, social unrest, political division, natural disasters, and/or economic uncertainty more than others, the truth is that this year has been heavy because there was so much extra emotional, mental, and even spiritual weight resting upon all of our shoulders.

So as December begins and marks the final month of this dumpster fire of a year, I can’t help but get excited about the prospect of leaving 2020 behind and entering into a new year. After a year like this one, I’m really ready for what’s next.

I’m not saying that on January 1, 2021, the world will magically be a better place and all our troubles will vanish in a poof of confetti. You and I both know that’s not going to happen. But what I am saying is that a fresh page is coming. And while you may not be able to keep some of the hard 2020 stuff from seeping onto that page, you do get to decide how you are going to show up on that page in the middle of the hard stuff. Not instead of the hard stuff; despite it.

And so the question that I’m asking myself, and the question I’m asking you, is: what do you want to carry with you into the next year? And what do you need to leave behind?

What’s worth holding onto, and what is simply too heavy to continue trying to hold up? What are the pieces of your life that are bringing you joy and peace and hope, and what is taking those things away from you?

Who were you at the start of 2020, and who are you now, and do you like the woman you’ve become? What hobbies did you stop doing this year because you were too tired or numb or simply unable to keep doing them, and what habits did you pick up that you now realize have got to go?

What did you cry about in 2020? What are the things and people worth your tears in 2021, and what or who are you done crying about?

Where have you let your external circumstances determine your internal joy and contentment and hope, and are you ready to let the One who created you be the one to define you again?

This December more than any other is a chance to leave some things behind in favor of ensuring we have the strength to continue carrying what really matters.

Because the truth is that life is heavy. And I’ve learned over the years that it doesn’t get any less heavy the older we get. If we’re not careful, we’ll turn into hard, worn out women with calloused hearts and backs so bent over that we can’t look up enough to see the good around us. That’s why it’s so important for us to make the decision to lighten our loads, to let go of the things weighing us down so that we can carry the things that will play a part in building the lives God wants us to have.

And here’s the thing: you may say you’re done carrying something heavy, only to pick it right back up in a few days. And that’s the beautiful thing about God’s grace. When - not if - we each pick up a heavy thing that we promised to leave behind, God helps us carry it, just like He always has. Eventually, He’ll help you get to a place where you can leave that heavy thing behind for good. Until then, He’s more than capable of bearing its weight to keep it from crushing you.

Sister, before the holidays come and life gets crazy one more time this year, I encourage you to pause and reflect. Ask God to help you see what you’ve been carrying for far too long, to notice what’s weighing you down, and to help you leave it on the pages of 2020 for good. Ask Him to help you show yourself His grace when you inevitably pick back up something you resolved to put down for good.

Whatever it is that you’re carrying, my prayer for you is that God will give you the strength to leave it behind in this year or the strength to carry it with you into the year ahead.

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Published in the 018 - December issue of TuesdayTribe

Written by Hannah Hladek